daughters of Eve

From the moment Eve ate the Forbidden Fruit in the Garden of Eden, she was doomed to be subject to her man (Genesis 3:16). Women have been the weaker, fairer (or whatever else you want to call it) sex since time immemorial. However, with the quest for equal rights for women, have women put themselves in a fix by setting such high standards for themselves?

In ancient times, men practised polygamy. The woman must follow her man wherever he went. This is the so-called 嫁鸡随鸡，嫁狗随狗 (marry chicken, follow chicken; marry dog, follow dog). A woman's quality of life depended on the kind of man she married. Watch any Chinese period drama (e.g. the current Channel U 10pm HK drama) and you will see. Men can change when they become powerful and women are always sadly drawn into men's affairs. There are the poor women who slogged with their husbands when they were poor. When the men became rich and powerful kings, the women had to share him with younger and prettier concubines and the man would ignore his wife (who has since gone south). That's probably why women are inherently vain. They needed to prettify themselves to capture the attention of influential men so that they can have a good life. And maybe that's why these women became scheming and evil. They lost the trust they had in their men, and they will fight for their son to be the next king, because they know that the only man who would listen to them was their son (of course until he finds himself a wife whom he will listen to.. until he finds pretty concubines and stop listening to his wife.. and the cycle starts again.). So anyway, these women will end up becoming the Empress Dowagers. They may hold the reins of the throne, but deep down inside, they haven't achieved anything in their lives. Because they lost the love of the man who used to love them so deeply, and they are embroiled in the affairs of the government. Women don't want to lead such lonely lives. So although they may be decked in pearls, gold and silk, I feel so sad for them. And those concubines, what sad lives. Pretty and all, but the emperor has thousands of them to choose from and the concubines had to fight for his attention. No wonder women became so bitchy.

With the women’s suffrage movement in the early 20th century, the trend towards monogamy and the enactment of the Women’s Charter, women around the world advocated the equal rights of women. The women have succeeded to a large extent. Women can now, inter alia, vote, have equal wages for the same amount of work done as men and choose who they wished to marry. However, I feel that women, especially those who advocate true equality between men and women, have gone too far and have put themselves in a huge fix. What women want is to have equal chances as men to do things, e.g. work in a certain field, have a choice as to what they want in life, but women do not want to be exactly the same as men. Yet many women attempt to assert their power in a way that is utterly irrational. “If men can do this, so can I.” So women say they can be CEOs and presidents. Fair enough. And women say they can climb mountains and lift weights that men can. Also fair enough. But what irks me is when such ambitious women also say, “well, I can be a CEO/president because if men can do it, so can I, but I still think men should open doors and pull out chairs for me.” There really shouldn’t be such double standards. Such women do not deserve my respect. If you think you are too weak to open doors, pull out chairs and need a man’s shoulder to cry on, then you really shouldn’t be equal to men.

Nevertheless, I am sure women of today are very happy with their status. In fact, I feel that women have more privileges than men these days! We have women-only gyms, events (Women’s Day Out, Shape Run – only for women so that we won’t feel uncomfortable sweating it out with smelly men around), huge shopping malls and make up counters largely for the female market. Although men are no longer ostracized as gays if they do shop, you have to admit, the retail industry IS geared towards women. And I am not complaining.

There are differing views as to the rights that women have today. I personally feel that women must have equal opportunity to make their own choices as men and receive equal treatment/judgment in the quality of their work. The point is not that women can become CEOs/presidents and climb mountains because they are as strong as men, but because they should have an equal chance to pursue their goals in life. However, there is really no need to push ourselves to such a high standard of wanting to be treated as equal to men. I still want my man to open doors and pull out my chair for me. Simply because I am a woman. :)